My thoughts about swine flu

For the love of god, make it stop! I can't go anywhere, or turn on the TV without hearing about the stupid swine flu. Even my morning sunshine Robin Meade won't shut up about it.

This morning I saw people around town wearing face masks. Please make it stop. Its the fucking flu, not the fucking plague!

What makes this flu worse than other flu's? I don't know, is it because it is from Mexico? Are the symptoms worse than any other flu's? I have been trying to block everything about this thing out, but I can't. Instead of fighting it I decided to look up what the symptoms are.

• fever
• sore throat
• diarrhea
• vomiting
• chills
• cough
• fatigue

So am I the only one missing something here? Has anyone ever been to Mexico? Go down to Mexico and party for a weekend, and you will have the same exact symptoms as the swine flu. Plus you might even have to throw in a STD test for shits and giggles. I have been down that scary Mexican I-want-to-die-I'm-never-drinking-tequila-again-road before, and its not fun. Give me the swine flu. At least I know that it will be over in a few days if drink some OJ.

Please swine flu, go away. Or at least go back to Mexico. Just like other flu's, the only people that are in danger are old farts and tots. Anyone with a healthy immune system should fight it off in a few days.