1. Bosch KGU30605 Fridge – who needs space for six eggs when you can save room and only keep five in the fridge? And perhaps try to grow a chicken from the other one.
2. Zanussi ZWF14581 Washing Machine – ignore the 40 degrees warning on most synthetics as this not-so-intelligent machine automatically washes them at 60.
3. LG 37LF66 Television – want to go to bed after a night of watching TV? You'll have to pull the plug out of the mains, then.
4. Easy Store Large Slide – this slide looks great with its super bright yellow colour to match all those pretty flowers. Only trouble is that all your local insects are equally attracted to it.
5. Kenwood DW12CFE Dishwasher – if you follow the instructions and stack up your normal-sized plates on the bottom tray you soon realise there's a small problem – they stop the spray arm from spinning and therefore don't get washed. Not only that, if you try to take out the trays then the washer won't start. Genius.
The 5 egg fridge is just plain retarded. I know my fridge can hold the 'bakers dozen'. I guess the 5 egg fridge can be referred to the down syndrome dozen.
A TV without a off switch is pretty bad too. I wonder how you change the channels.